Hello friends. I haven't forgotten about you, but it has been a long, trying few weeks. I hope to be back to the regular world sometime soon.

In the mean time, a little inspiration:


original image here.

Project FAIL

I try to do at least one project a day with Gretchen. I do it for the standard reasons like developing motor skills and all that, but I also do it because it will keep her occupied for longer than 5 minutes. Two-year-olds aren't exactly known for their long attention spans so I consider a project a success if it captures her attention long enough for some sort of finished object. Sometimes that's a whole painting, and sometimes that's a couple of construction paper circles halfheartedly glued to a sheet of newsprint. Like most parents, I consider myself to be the expert in my child and I am usually pretty adept at picking activities that fit her interests and skill level.

But sometimes I fail. And I fail hard.

Enter macaroni necklaces. I was sure that macaroni necklaces were going to be a HUGE hit. Gretchen is really into dress up. She's constantly begging me for my jewelery. She insists that she is "the Princess Pea" from Super Why! and walks around with a magic wand. She loves playing with her pasta. What could go wrong?

She was unimpressed. Completely, totally and utterly uninterested. Instead of bailing I tried to sweeten the deal with construction paper shapes that she could string like beads. She wanted the hole puncher. I tried to show her how to use it but she wasn't interested in the direction and also couldn't figure out how to squeeze the punch. Cue epic meltdown. There was crying. There was screaming. There was kicking and pants-peeing. Did I mention the screaming? 'Cause there was a lot of that.

I spent a lot of time trying to figure out where exactly I went wrong. She should have been interested in making necklaces! Stringing isn't above her skill set. She's into necklaces and construction paper. We used tape! Macaroni necklaces should have been a hit!

But they weren't. In retrospect, I was so into the project and so convinced that Gretchen would enjoy herself that I ignored the signs that she wasn't having fun. I continued to push her to string even when it was clear she was no longer interested, and I threw in another element with the hole puncher. The hole puncher would have been OK, and might have even saved the activity, except she didn't know how to use it. I let her continue to fumble with the hole puncher until she got so frustrated she couldn't handle it. Epic Mama fail. I know better. But hey, at least I learned something.

But enough of that. Tomorrow is another day and right now I have a sleeping toddler, a warm bed and a little baby waiting to cuddle.


The calm before the storm.

Watercolor painting

Watercolor painting is a favorite activity in our house. It's cheap, easy and not particularly messy. I also like to use it for an activity that doesn't need a lot of guidance or supervision. I can easily set G up with a thing of cheap watercolor paints, paper and a glass of water while I clean the bathroom or tend to her younger sister. Please remember that not all children will be up for this kind of independent activity and be prepared to clean paint from your carpets, table, floors, walls and kid if you do decide to walk away for a few minutes.

When I set G up with a project such as this I
follow these steps:

• I cover the table in paper. I do this so she will have a large surface on which to paint on, and so I won't have to change her paper every two minutes. I'm not worried about messes; watercolors clean up easily. If you are worried, lay a vinyl shower curtain or table cloth down before your paper. Tape the paper down so your artist can paint freely without worrying about the paper shifting around.
  
• I pre-moisten the watercolor paints for her (I use the cheap watercolors because she likes to mix and blend and have access to the whole pot of paints and also because that is what I have easiest access to). I show her how to drop a little bit of water with her brush to make the paints wetter, if that's what she would like.
• I give her a small container of water to clean her brushes with. I used to use a normal glass but found she's less likely to drink the water if I put it in a jar or other container.
  
• I give her three brushes and ONLY three brushes: a large, a medium, and a small. With these three brushes she can paint using different strokes without being overwhelmed by choices.
  
• Sometimes I show her different ways of using the paints, like getting the paper wet and then adding the colors, but most often I sit back and let her explore on her own.

I admit that I am not an artist and I don't know a whole lot about the appropriate methods for watercolor painting. I may be doing it all wrong but that's not the point anyway. Focus on the process, not the product.

"Today was a difficult day. Tomorrow will be better."

Newsflash: raising a toddler is often challenging on the best of days. On the worst of days it's enough to give even the most cheerful parent post traumatic stress disorder. I am not the most cheerful parent, and today was not the best of days.

It started early. Something like 3:00 am when my 2.5 year-old, G, woke screaming from a nightmare. She calmed quickly but tossed and turned the rest of the night. At 6 I heard her leave the room. Then the screaming began. She wanted water, but not in that cup. She didn't want to take off her "nigh-nigh" diaper. She wanted breakfast but not cereal or yogurt or toast, no no; she wanted popcorn. By the time my husband left for work she'd had 1,ooo little meltdowns, each over something I thought was silly.

I tried to save the day: we watched her favorite movie, we painted with two kinds of paints, we colored, we listened to Yo Gabba Gabba music and had a dance party, we played with Little People, we read books. We had a hot bath (well she had a bath, I watched). By noon I was exhausted and almost as cranky as G. My baby daughter, maybe picking up on the mood in the room or maybe just sick of being half neglected, started to fuss and whine too. I thought I was going to lose it.

I'm often at a loss on what to do in situations such as these. Something in me, the part that reads way too many blogs written by perfect parents who would never snap at their equally perfect children, feels like there is something I should be doing to diffuse the situation. Most of me just wants to yell, "QUIT IT ALREADY KID!" Well, if I knew how to diffuse things I guess I wouldn't be dealing with a whiny kid all day, and if yelling worked I guess I wouldn't have a two-year-old who randomly shouts"THAT'S ENOUGH!!!" at me when she gets frustrated*. So I gave myself a time-out. I picked up G and laid her in bed with a book. I picked up the baby and carted her around in the baby carrier. I made myself a cup of coffee. I told both girls that I loved them. Both of them fell asleep within minutes.

I still don't know if this was the right thing to do. I still feel guilty because I let myself get to the point where I was snippy and wanted to yell. I still feel like I should be able to do something, anything, salvage our day. But in the end maybe I did do the best I could. And maybe all I need to remember is that, " Today was a difficult day. Tomorrow will be better." That quote, by the way, is from Lilly's Purple Plastic Purse by Kevin Henke. Yeah, I get my parenting advice from books written for kindergartners. What's your point?


*That makes it seem like I yell all the time or something. I don't, but I'm not going to pretend I've never done it, either. It's something that I'm working on and I'm happy to say several months ago we made our house a place where we don't yell when we get angry or frustrated.

How I learned to love creating with my kid

painting with my oldest kid.

Creating art with little kids can be a really fun time. It can also be an exercise in patience and letting go. The letting go thing has been the hardest for me. I'm a perfectionist, and it's a problem in my own life. I often have difficulty finishing things because they're not exactly how I want them and I do not want to pass that onto my girls.

Where was I going with that? Oh, letting go. When doing projects with your toddler or preschooler, learn to let go. Making art, especially at this age, is about the process and not the finished product. With that in mind, here is how I go about working projects with my two-year-old daughter:

• I explain the project I have in mind. If we're making coffee filter snowflakes, for example, I tell her that we will be drawing on the coffee filters and cutting them out to look like snow flakes.
• I outline the rules of the project. These are usually rules like not coloring all over the table and not slurping down the salt dough.
  
• I show her all the materials we will be using and I let her explore them before we actually start the project.
  
• I show her how to work with the materials. Right now we do a lot of projects where we glue stuff to paper, usually with a glue stick. I show her what we will be gluing, how to use the glue stick, and how to stick the gluey item to the paper. When we use watercolors, I show her how to dip her brush to get her paints wet, and so on.
  
• I frequently start the same project at the same time as her. I do this for two reasons: one, I won't be tempted to take over when she's not doing it "right" and two, she can see what I'm doing and copy my actions. I also like making stuff :)
  
• I let her have control. If she wants to color all her snowflakes black, so be it. If she wants to color her nose instead of the paper, I'm usually game. Using the materials in "improper" ways is another important part of the learning process.
• Move on if your child doesn't seem interested in the activity.
• Do try things more than once, even if your child doesn't seem interested at first.
• Don't fret and don't stress. Have fun. Laugh. Embrace mess, because you're going to have it.

So there you go. Some tips for making art time an enjoyable time for your child and for you.

Oh, how things change!

My baby turned one!
I'm back in graduate school!
I have no free time!

It's been a busy couple of months, but we are all starting to settle into our new routine. Hopefully blogging, knitting and sleeping with resume soon.

My big girl!

Whoa! I have a toddler! G has been taking steps for a while now but hasn't really been walking independently. Today that all changed and she started racing around the living room. I can't believe what a big girl she's become all of a sudden. She is very into stuffed animals, Dr. Seuss' ABC's, the cat, and rolling a ball. She has six or so words (hi, kitty, dada, mama, dog, that, hey), three signs (more, milk, all done), and she loves to dance. I'm sad to see my little one grow up, but I can't wait to see what's in her future.